Dreams and Why I Don’t Want One


"The invariable mark of a dream is to see it come true."    - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The raging thunderstorm inside was too much to handle. I kept on fighting the winds only to fall back on where I started. My eyes were all blurry with the strong gust and rain falling on my face. Everywhere I saw were dark clouds hovering closer and closer..

It was getting dark.

Just then the wind stopped. Was the worst over? Or was this the uncomfortable calm just before the storm. I was nervous and yet anxious. I didn’t know what lay in front of me and yet I didn’t want to know that either..and yet I had to.

I stood there for a moment and then dashed forward, quickening my pace. From the corner of my eyes I could see lightning flash across the horizon. I held my belongings close to my heart and kept walking, eyes firmly on the ground.

I was immersed in the petrichor all around and for a moment a faint smile was all what I had.

Dreams are the doors of uncertainty
image courtesy - www.brooksjensenarts.com
Behind me were the clouds and lay in front of me was a dry desert kissed by the rain after a thousand years. The sky was red and I had to run; I had to reach there, somewhere.

I called out for someone, anyone. The silence was all what I got in return. The silence of the world when the wind stops, was all what I got in return. Like dead leaves getting crushed under me, my dream was collapsing on me…The weight of my emotions was too much to handle..to carry.

And then, it rained.

I turned around. I saw clouds of rain slowly making their way towards me and I just couldn’t outrun them.

Yes! My dream was collapsing..and fast!

Dreams don’t play by your rules, it’s the other way round. It is just the feeling that matters. When you are in a beautiful dream, just when you are enjoying it, it ends...It vanishes. And no matter how much you try to move out of a nightmare, you just can’t.

You are your own prisoner in the dreams.

It really amazes me when I see myself in one of my dreams. I just don’t like them one bit. They make me hate the world I wake up to. I just have myself in those dreams and the people who are out there to catch me.

And I am just running away from them all the time. I don’t know the reason why they are out to catch me, I don’t want to. All I care is to wake up to a world that otherwise, treats me like a step-son.

There will be a day I will stop running. There will be a day when I will face the demons, demons that held me captive my own dream. I will confront them and chase them away. There will be a day, when I will quit dreaming altogether.

That day will I be born, out of the ashes of my own dreams.

One day. Someday.

13 comments:

  1. I don't think i need to write anything after what you have seen me doing!!!!!! I still am!!! This time i decided not to write anything.....God bless!!!!!

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  2. Stay awake...stay sane...Android T-shirt slogan for you!

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  3. Amazing :) Loved reading your post :)Sharmistha

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  4. As long as everything is fine with you, I'm fine with that, I believe....

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  5. Nice thought with great interpretation... very well done....

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  6. "That day will I be born, out of the ashes of my own dreams."

    this line says it all..
    magical...

    keep writing da..:)

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  7. very true.. we are the prisoners of our own dreams.. well expressed... n well written

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  8. Lovely written, but I have to say that I don't agree with one sentence: "Dreams don’t play by your rules, it’s the other way round." Sometimes I can somehow "direct" my dreams and I often do so. I can't do it always though.

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  9. Love you magical touches! Very interesting... depicts your own characteristics buddy! Good job!

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  10. Hi Aurindham,

    Have you registered for the Kolkata IndiBlogger Meet? After a long time the IndiBlogger wagon is coming to our favorite city Kolkata. Hope to meet you and other bloggers at the meet.

    Cheers,
    Anwin
    IndiBlogger Team

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  11. beautiful is the word. although in my life dreams have not just played a very pivotal role but also have helped me stand in the toughest and darkest of times. maybe its more in the belief that u put in ur dreams than anything else! but ur write up made me look at ur view point too..
    well done!



    sarah

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  12. Beautiful post! It brought to mind of one of my recent posts in the same vein (dreams). You can read it here:

    http://apainterlylife.blogspot.com/2011/03/sweet-dreams-and-starlight.html

    Have a wonderful day, ~Carla

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  13. I love my dreams. They make me contemplate my life and why I love what I love. And why I dream what I do. And I am happy that in these days and times, my dreams and my life aren't telling me different things.

    Dreams are like any other tool. They can benefit or they can hurt you.

    I remember in college I told myself I didn't want to dream anymore; my dreams were disturbing real life too much. So I stopped remembering them for some time, just like that. Now I want to remember everything :)

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Aurindam Mukherjee